What kind of problems do couples deal with in therapy?
Communication
This can take the form of too much hostility, anger and conflict, or conversely, it can take the form of silence, depressive feelings, withdrawal, hopelessness or deadness in the relationship. Problems in communication frequently are connected to sexual difficulties as well.
Reenacting Old Patterns
Perhaps you find that you are behaving toward each other in the same way that you reacted to your parents during childhood. Conversely, you may find yourself replicating dysfunctional aspects of your parents’ relationship with each other. This includes difficulties that survivors of child abuse and neglect, as well as adult children of substance abusers, bring to relationships.
Trauma
Many types of trauma—assault, rape, death, accidents, robbery, suicide (or attempted suicide), illness, disability, affairs and other types of betrayal—can affect couples. You may need assistance dealing with a current trauma, or with a trauma that occurred in the past.
Life Transitions
Couples go through predictable developmental stages, each stage containing tasks that need to be completed successfully. There are also transitions—such as career change and relocation, including immigration—that are not predictable. You may need assistance with a present transition, or with the results of past transitions.
Commitment
Taking the next step, whether it is monogamy, cohabitation, marriage, or starting a family can bring up new concerns and issues. The two of you might need to explore unconscious expectations and fears, values, lifestyle differences, money management, extended family involvement, etc. Conversely, if you are choosing to break your commitment by separation or divorce, you may need assistance as well.
Diversity
In mixed marriages, ethnic, cultural and religious differences may lead to misunderstandings and conflict. If you are in a gay, lesbian, inter-faith, interracial or interethnic relationship you may need assistance with the 'isms' from family, friends, or other sources.